As I was typing this entry, I juz had an argument with him. It's too absurd that I don't know how to start it off here. "Skeptical", i just can't accept that word from him.
Firstly, I don't simply chat with anyone online unless there's a question-answer thingy via msn.
Secondly, I is prefer texting or calling on phone to chat.
Lastly, as for calls, I do not like to talk on phone in the morning when I'm awake till I left for work and after work till 10pm, other time slots, feel free to talk/chat with me. But last point is for friends/colleagues, not boyfriend. I just feel that the boyfriend should know my whereabouts 24/7, that's why he can abort my "law of talking". And of cos, urgent matters regarding my close ones.
I used to feel really rotten during my poly days and I reckon that's becos I've been too hyped up in school. I never find time to engage in any contemplation about my doings and unable to re-collect myself at the end of day and find the peace that I need. I need to stop 'socialising' with people around me becos I need to have the time for myself.
Eventually, I've become a less easygoing person, someone more heavyhearted than before but I'm feeling O-kay with who I am now. At least I know what I want, what can makes me happy and able to perceive matters with big clear eyes and handle them accordingly.
I am learning to accept the melancholy truth in life, so I can live happier and be more forgiving. Being less fortunate(in any way) helps me to appreciate Happiness more, that's what I've realised.
when there's something bad,
a lot of people go bad themselves
and that's how awful it is
turning half the heart into something hard and dark.
Why can't I just do something that I like without bothering what others might think about me? I hope to turn back time and become a child, act like one.
Maybe someday, I can heal myself, do things my way and kiss the old me on my forehead.
Heaven-ly
.
